March 2003
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Hail to the Chief, baby
05 March, 2003 at 01:46 PM by Ren | Permalink
Yes. I know.
It's been half a month since I've posted. I can honestly say that my life has been *that* boring in the past 15 days or so. Well, I'll post everything that has happened that I feel like mentioning here.
I went to El Paso, the border town of my birth. What a dry, dirty place. It's cleaned up a lot, but goddammit, there's no trees there anymore! Or grass. It sucks. Anyway, we went for my cousin's sweet sixteen party. I can't believe she's 16. I remember when she was born. Isn't that crazy? I'm old.
I saw a bunch of my cousins who used to only speak spanish. I spoke spanish to them and they spoke in english to me. It's zany! Who knew?!
I spent that whole weekend with my father (yeah, who knew I could tolerate him that long...and actually enjoy it!) and my brother Eric. Eric has a new nickname. He didnt' like it when I would call him freaknut, so I now just call him Nut. So, from now on, he's Nut. He didn't seem to mind that one so much.
At the party I got seriously drunk with my family. Damn them for being able to outdrink me. I must've had something like 10 beers that night. Way too much. WAY too much. Dammit.
Random thought: my doctor looks like a young Dr. Ruth. Crazy right?
Lets see, oh yes. Now on to the subject line of this post. See, I was sitting at the Staff Council meeting minding my own, when they brought up the subject of electing officers for next year. Somehow or another (and despite my best efforts to hide under the table) I got elected president!
Yes, that's President-Elect Echavarri to you guys. Who's the First lady? Nunya Bidness, that's who. However, since I'm a bachelor President, so I'm sure my personal life will be slathered all over the campus tabloids. I can see it now. I just have to remind myself that it's better to be talked badly about then to not be talked about at all.
I even have an agenda ready for when I become Pres. Standing committees baby. I'm all about delegating authority. It just makes more sense. I don't want to hear about the stupid centerpiece decorations for the christmas party. Someone else can fuss with that.
Right.
Well, I have tons of work to do today, so I'm on my way out! I'll talk to you guys later.
Hold on, I'm posting soon
07 March, 2003 at 11:52 AM by Ren | Permalink
Dammit, hold your horses. I have to go to lunch first. I have a post all ready to go. Just gimme time!
TTYL
I love babelfish!
09 March, 2003 at 05:41 PM by Ren | Permalink
I know I promised more the other day, but funk dat. I was busy. Now I just don't feel like posting about that.
So I'm here on a boring Sunday afternoon and I'm playing with Babelfish on Altavista.
I think this is WAY funny:
Espacio. La frontera final. Éstas son las viajes de la nave Enterprise. Su misión de continuación: para explorar los mundos nuevos extraños, buscar nueva vida y nuevas civilizaciones, para ir audazmente a adonde ha ido nadie antes.
Classic.
I'm such a nerd.
Late night headaches suck
10 March, 2003 at 01:02 AM by Ren | Permalink
Stupid headache. I can't sleep.
blah.
It doesn't help that I really wanna go to sleep, but I just can't seem to seal the deal. Stupid. Headache.
Ok, I think I'm going to watch TV until I pass out.
Dearest Wonderbread:
10 March, 2003 at 03:56 PM by Ren | Permalink
ITS AUGUST, GODDAMMIT
AUGUST AUGUST AUGUST!
and not a moment after.
So there.
Caranthir Telperiën
11 March, 2003 at 07:50 PM by Ren | Permalink
According to the Elf Name Generator, that's my Elvish name.
Hee!
16 March, 2003 at 01:28 PM by Ren | Permalink
I'm keeping last night ALL TO MYSELF!
So there.
but for real: hee!
Interesting
17 March, 2003 at 02:09 PM by Ren | Permalink
So it seems like we're going to war...
I sent the above link in an email to my father with the text below (oK, so I've added a few things since then, but the gist was there!).
Subject: Coming soon to a TV screen near you...
Gulf War II: the wreckoning!
Starring George W. Bush as "the President"
Reprising his role as Colin Powell is...uh...Colin Powell
Also reprising his role: Dick Cheney as "the reanimated corpse of Former Secretary of Defense Dick Cheney"
(in the original he died of heart failure, but Donald Rumsfeld breathed new life into his corpse using dark magic, voodoo and lots of oil.)
Also featuring Tony Blair as "the Prime Minister"
Special appearances by Saddam Hussein as "the Dictator"
Gerrard Depardieu as "the French"
Jackie Chan, Danny Glover, Edward James Olmos, Kevin Kline and Anna Kornukova as "the UN Security Council"
Featuring a cast of thousands of oppressed Kurds and Shias;
dazzling special effects provided by the United States Armed Forces
AND
guest starring George H. W. Bush as "Bush the Elder", William Jefferson Clinton as "Billy J the womanizer" (he has friends in Hollywood after all), Monica Lewinsky as Billy J's love interest and Geraldo Rivera as the intrepid journalist who uncovers the dark secrets of the Dictator's buried vaults bunkers.
The Day of Wreckoning Arrives 17 March, 2003 on MSNBC, Fox News and CNN.
If you get tired of all that nonsense, you can read this...mighty interesting stuff.
Ick
17 March, 2003 at 10:36 PM by Ren | Permalink
I turned into my grandmother tonight.
We went to dinner at the macaroni grill. Everything was so much fun. Good friends, good bread, blah blah blah. We placed our order; jokes were made, appetizers consumed.
Then the entrees came out. Everyone got their food except for me and GGS (that's liz...Girl Got SkIlLz). We waited.
and waited.
I got upset and lost my appetite.
When she and I finally got our food, I got bitchy and had the waitress take it back. I said (and oh so bluntly and rudely, i'm so sorry waitress!) "Put it in a box, i'm not hungry anymore."
Oh dear god, when did I turn into my grandmother? She would do that all the time! One good thing did come of the whole ordeal.
They comped my meal.
And yes, I still tipped the waitress. The problem lied with those fuckers in the kitchen, not the waitress.
But seriously, when did I turn into my grandma? Before you know it, i'll be blaming all the worlds problems on The Jews. *sigh*
I think this is a
18 March, 2003 at 11:25 AM by Ren | Permalink
I think this is a really good journal entry. I don't know the guy, but I found the link somewhere else. I thought it was really good.
I'm at a lack for what to post, so ... whatever : D
Gerrard Depardieu
18 March, 2003 at 01:40 PM by Ren | Permalink
In honor of my French bashing (hey, if my grandma can hate The Jews, I can be allowed to bash the French once in a while), my friend Gidget sent me "a complete military history of the French" which I now present in its entireity.
Gallic Wars - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by, of all Things, an Italian.Hundred Years War.
Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman."Italian Wars - Lost.
France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.Wars of Religion.
France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots.Thirty Years War.
France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.War of Devolution - Tied.
Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.The Dutch War - Tied.
War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian
War. - Lost, but claimed as a tie.
Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.War of the Spanish Succession - Lost.
The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.American Revolution.
In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."French Revolution.
Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.The Napoleonic Wars - Lost.
Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.The Franco-Prussian War - Lost.
Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.World War I.
Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States and Britain. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein."Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.World War II - Lost.
Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.War in Indochina - Lost.
French forces plead sickness, take to bed with te Dien Bien Flu.Algerian Rebellion - Lost.
Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.War on Terrorism.
France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.
My father, being the astute history buff he is, notes that this list is incomplete: France also lost to MEXICO when Napoleon III attempted to install Maximillian as Emperor of Mexico. Now lets face it, that's pretty fucking pathetic when you lose to the MEXICANS. Speaking as a mexican-american, I think its almost laughable that you could lose a war to the MEXICANS. These are the people that sit on bridges all day and sell you chiclets. And they defeated you. And yet you still remain snooty!
that's just dirty.
My father also told me a few bad jokes about the French. Like to hear it here it go!
Do you know why the French line the Champs Elysses with Trees???
So the German Armies could march in the Shade.
Do you know how many French soldiers it takes to defend the Maginot Line
from a German Invasion?
Neither do the French.
Thank you. Thank you. Given this lashing that I have unleashed upon the Gauls, I fully expect them to surrender to the Tastavians shortly.
Jacques Chirac, I'm looking RIGHT AT YOU.
Dammit!
18 March, 2003 at 03:35 PM by Ren | Permalink
And I was thinking I was pretty witty for coming up with Gulf War II: the Wreckoning--and then I read theonion.com and see they've already done it!
Shit.
Funk dat. I should be proud. Casting Gerrard Depardieu as the entire French people is pure Comedy Gold.
Oh God, this again?
24 March, 2003 at 09:46 AM by Ren | Permalink
Have you ever woken up on a Monday morning and thought that very same thing?
I did this morning.
I really contemplated staying home; work was not an option. But then I realized that I'm way out of vacation time and we can't be playing sick all the time. So here I am, wasting my day at work. I have gotten a lot done so far. By a lot I mean that I have browsed all my morning websites in half the time. Seriously though.
The last week was just this serious rollercoaster of emotion. Way fun if you like seeing me mood swing. Not fun if you don't like bitchy Ren. There was a lot of stuff gotten out in the air, so that's always good. The week wasn't a total loss though; even though I didn't get to spend near as much time as I was anticipating with Wonderbread, I did get one good day in. He already knows that one day isn't near enough, and will now spend the next 6 years making it up to me (that's a conservative estimate).
He and I have very interesting arguments. We almost never fight face to face. We just get upset and write letters or call eachother on the phone. It seems to expedite the healing process. Plus, if you write letters you can end them with snooty remarks like "I bid you good day!" You just can't do that in real conversation without wanting to break out laughing. Try it sometime. It won't work.
I have new pictures for all four of you to see. Here, here and here.
The rest of the photos were just not appropriate to share. Also, my head just looked friggen enormous in the rest of them.
As for the rest of the weekend, I'm keeping my feelings to myself. I have much to ponder; I'm in a much better mood though. That's always good. But it is a Monday, and I'm hungry and I want to go home already. *sigh* Long week this is gonna be.
a new quote
26 March, 2003 at 01:51 PM by Ren | Permalink
I was watching Six Feet Under yesterday and I got a new quote to live by.
This one follows my other two favorite quotes which are:
1. Let me pass now from fiction into legend - the Vampire Lestat in Memnoch the Devil
2. Tomorrow do your worst, for I have lived today - Some dead roman guy who's name eludes me.
and now 3.
I think if you're afraid of something, it probably means you should go ahead and do it. - Bettina (Kathy Bates' character) on Six Feet Under
I think that's a good quote. It's very applicable.
In other news, today was the day of the groundbreaking ceremony for our new School of Pharmacy building here at work. Everything went wonderfully; I got great pictures with my digital camera--then when i went to make the photo gallery the flash card died.
Yes. It died.
It took all 50 pictures I took with it. Good pictures. All gone. Fucking flash card. I'm so pissed. I'm convinced the card is bad, because this is the third or fourth time the card has done this. It totally sucks. I tried every undelete trick I knew, and nothing. Fucking card.
Oh well. At least the quote was good.
My day is better already
26 March, 2003 at 02:01 PM by Ren | Permalink
First off, i found an acoustic version of Breakfast after Ten. I'll post it later.
Second, my new Blue October CD came in!!!!
This totally makes up for my camera fucking up! WHEEEEEE!!!
Yawn
28 March, 2003 at 03:44 PM by Ren | Permalink
I honestly wonder how many of my journal entries start off with that very title? Probably more than I'd care to know about.
Just a few short bullets before I go off and fritter time away until 5 hits (and I wonder why I always have such shitty Mondays).
The new Blue October CD totally kicks ass. Totally. There is none higher. I highly recommend it. Highly.
I had a really good entry planned when I woke up this morning, but shampooing my hair quickly washed all my intelligence out of my body, so this is what you're getting. Sorry : ) Have a good weekend.
Insomnia
31 March, 2003 at 01:20 AM by Ren | Permalink
See, this is what I'm reduced to when I can't sleep. Dear God. Stop the Madness.
vanguardboi: omg... I finished on lesson of my TABC certification test
AricDanyul: hehe
vanguardboi: oh fun fun
AricDanyul: speaking of alchoolism!
AricDanyul: err alcoholism...
AricDanyul: : )
vanguardboi: lol it allows me to serve alcohol ;)
AricDanyul: oh my god
AricDanyul: i love you.
AricDanyul: : D
AricDanyul: well wait
AricDanyul: let me rephrase that
AricDanyul: bring me things from Best Buy
AricDanyul: liquor me up
AricDanyul: and dress like a jedi padawan
AricDanyul: oh yeah.
vanguardboi: lmao
I think I just lost respect for myself. I think. Oh fuck it. I can't sleep anyway.
Lunch today
31 March, 2003 at 04:58 PM by Ren | Permalink
I so had a dirty, dirty thing happen at lunch today.
I was getting a sub sandwich from the new sub shop in the SUB (i know, way too many subs in that sentence, bear with me) and as I'm getting my tuna salad sammich I say that I want that ho on white bread. She asks "Six inch or Twelve?"
I was flummoxed! Freaky was next to me, and I actually had to think about what to say. There were several possibilities:
Her: Six inch or twelve?
Ren: It's been a while, we'll have to work back up to the twelve...let's try six.Her: Six inch or twelve?
Ren: Wouldn't you like to know? *winkwink*Her: Six inch or twelve?
Ren: What kind of boy do you think I am?Her: Six inch or twelve?
Ren: Can I get both?Her: Six inch or twelve?
Ren: I'm sorry, but I don't give out that kind of information.
So anyway, that was what made my lunch hour interesting. Freaky laughed. I won't tell you what I ended up answering the girl. It wasn't nearly as funny as any of those up there...which is pretty sad, because none of those were very funny.